and ramblings on everything in between
I overanalyze everything.
I want to be as cost effective, efficient, prepared, and correct as I can be in life. But the grounds for a yes or a no can be shaky sometimes. After all, there is a lot of gray area in life, and for good reason. We were given the gift of free will. We get to happily make or not make decisions as we see fit every minute of the day. We have the ability to fail, come up short, and sink. Sometimes sinking is just what we need.
My quest to make the best decision possible 100% of the time often has me chasing after God a lot harder than I would without that desire. I know I am incapable of messing up His plan, so no matter what decisions I make His will will be done, but I often beg for confirmation that I’m on the right path.
Please, Lord – send a still, small voice, a burning bush, an army, SOMETHING!
This idea was recently proposed to me: You can come to the best possible solution to any problem by being honest and doing what is right. That’s all you need to focus on.
But my overanalyzing mind is not satisfied with that. Not at all.
Being honest doesn’t help me to decide which city to live in, or which church to go to, or when to take or not take a new job. Doing the right thing doesn’t help me to understand which relationships to pursue, or which car to drive, or which vacation to go on.
As I look over that list, I have to ask myself, “Does it really matter?” In the grand scheme of things, does it all really matter if you are in fact being honest and doing what is right along the way?”
See, there I go overanalyzing it again. I’ve got 30 years of a bad habit to break.
Instead of treating life like a maze, where door are only opened when we are as cost effective, efficient, prepared, and correct as possible, life should be treated like the precious experience that it is. There is a great, big world we get to experience along the path of being honest and doing what is right. Maybe some of those experiences are perfect, and maybe some of them are painful. But what will make each one richer is when we go through them with honestly and goodness on our side.